The Try Again Chart: A Gentle Tool for Growing Confidence and Resilience in Kids

If you’ve ever watched a child freeze in the moment, it’s likely because something feels hard – whether it’s tying their shoes, figuring out homework, or trying a new skill. There’s also a high chance that you’ve probably seen the negative self-talk that follows:

“I can’t.”

“I’m bad at this.”

“It’s too hard.”

Kids often interpret difficulty as failure, but difficulty is where learning lives. The Try Again Chart is a gentle, visual way to help kids push through those moments with encouragement rather than pressure.

This simple tool can be used at home and in classrooms. It supports emotional wellness, problem-solving, and confidence-building without overwhelming kids. I’ve used it with many of my students in the past and I can say first-hand it’s been very successful!

Why Do Kids Shut Down When Things Feel Hard?

It may be helpful to understand this question before we talk about the chart.

When kids encounter challenge, their nervous system can interpret it as a threat – especially if they’re used to things coming easily or if they’re worried about disappointing someone. This “threat response” leads to:

·       Avoidance (“I don’t want to”)

·       Self-criticism (“I’m bad at this”)

·       Perfectionism (“If it isn’t perfect, it’s wrong”)

·       Emotional shutdown (“Forget it…”)

Our job as the adults is not to remove the challenge, but to make the challenge feel safe.

That’s where the Try Again Chart comes in.

What Is the Try Again Chart?

It is a simple visual tracker that celebrates effort, persistence, and growth, not perfection. And trust me, kids love it!

Here’s how it works:

1.      The child chooses a skill or task that feels tricky.

2.      Each time they try again, they add a mark, sticker, initial, or doodle – we all know kids love stickers.

3.      After a certain number of tries, there’s a small milestone or positive acknowledgement.

4.      When the chart fills, you celebrate – not the result, but the journey.

The goal isn’t to force repeated attempts. The goal is to normalize the idea that:

Trying again is a part of learning – not a sign you’re “bad” at something.

This subtle shift grows resilience, self-trust, and perseverance – without shame or pressure.

Here’s What I’ve noticed Over Time

·       Fewer “I can’t” moments

·       More willingness to try

·       Less frustrated responses

·       Stronger self-talk

·       Improved problem solving

·       More pride in the learning process

Kids begin to believe:

“When things are hard, I don’t have to give up. I can try again.”

That’s resilience.

Here’s what you need – Bonus: you may already have this at your home:

·       A piece of paper

·       A whiteboard space

·       A notebook page

·       A laminated sheet

·       A printable template

You can give column names like:

·       Try #1

·       Try #2

·       Try #3

·       What I learned

·       How I felt

Or keep it as simple as a grid of circles they fill in.

Confidence doesn’t grow from being the best. Confidence grows from trying, failing, trying again, and knowing the adults around you are safe, patient, and cheering you on.

If you want to try out the Try Again Chart, start small,keep it gentle, and let the child lead. Send me an email, Instagram message, or Facebook message to let me know how it goes. I love to hear from readers like you!

They may just surprise you with how willing they are to try again – when trying feels safe.

Until next time…